Saturday, December 29, 2007


I am so sorry if I have not sent you pictures of little bit yet!!! I kind of lost track of who I still needed to send them to. So if you still want them please leave me your e-mail addresss in the comments section.

Friday, December 21, 2007


Go see it, my best friend from high school wrote it......I know, surreal right?

Monday, December 17, 2007

2 Months

Two Month Check-Up

Where to start….

When we first got little bit they told us that his testicles had not descended and that we need to keep an eye on it. My husband and I both agreed on many occasions that they looked like they had dropped, but then they looked like they would migrate back up. Well, we were half right, his testicles did drop, but in doing this it caused a double hernia in which he will need surgery next month. Needless to say, I am a little worried. He is just so little.
First, I have to go to the cardiologist to get his heart checked out since the doctor thought he heard an extra little beat. He doesn’t think it is anything, but we need to get it checked out before he has surgery. The weird coincidence is that I was just diagnosed with an extra heart beat this last summer. So now I tell people that we share the same heart.
The doctor also diagnosed the bruise like mark on his bottom as a Mongolian spot. He said it is common in children of African American descent. I thought it was from his deliveryJ I also just wanted it documented so that I would never be accused of putting it there. I know, isn’t sad that foster parents have to be so worried all the time.
There was also a little bump behind his right ear that was diagnosed as a swollen lymph node, nothing to worry about.

I left the office with an appointment with a cardiologist and a pediatric surgeon in January. I told the doctor that little bit would be on our private insurance after January 1 and he said that I should wait until then so that I could see certain doctors.

Baby Mama Drama Continued

My baby’s mama is being transferred from the mental hospital to what I am assuming is a residential facility 2 hours away! So our visit has obviously been cancelled again this week. I don’t know what type of visits they are going to be or what they are going to ask us to do from now on. I can’t imagine driving that once a month, let alone once a week. It would be a total of 4 hours at the minimum depending on traffic.

I have to be honest and say that I am a little relieved that she is not being moved back to the city we live in. She has a brother who also lives here and he has been trying to contact her and find out about the baby. She has already signed a document stating that she does not want him to have the baby, but I was worried that he would find her and try to talk her into it. She won’t receive phone calls from him at he mental hospital, so I am going to assume that will remain the case when she moves. Also, I highly doubt any other family members will make the trip to see her. It’s not that I don’t want family reunification; it’s just that I know her family’s history and I know that this child wouldn’t be anything more than a “paycheck.”

Hopefully, his caseworker will call me and let me know what the next is tomorrow.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007


Okay, I know, I am a bad blogger, but I promise to be better now!!! I am done with my Master's degree in education!!!!!! Well, I am waiting for my portfolio to be approved, but all of the papers have been handed in and graded.

Here is a post I wrote after our case plan meeting last month:

Case Plan Meeting
The visit today was just as bizarre as usual. First, the guard at the gate of the mental hospital would not let me in since I could not remember the name of the building mom was in. Of course, once my case worker showed she decided that I could be let in, but I better follow the proper procedures next time. We walked into the facility and bio dad and mom were waiting in the hall for us. Little bit looks just like his father. Mom was more interested in dad then the baby. She was quite out of it and couldn’t stop, crying, swearing and talking gibberish. When we went to the visitor’s room the VOA representatives were already seated, as was the social worker from the hospital, little bits case worker, the psychiatrist, and little bit’s case investigator. The room is set up with a table and chairs in the middle and two couches, one on each side of the table. Everyone was sitting at the table except my husband and I and little bit were on one couch, and the bio dad was on the other couch. The case worker kept trying to start the meeting, but mom couldn’t pull herself together. She keep crying and talking about if she would ever get out of the hospital she would……. Dad did try to tell her to take her meds and listen. Dad also did hold the baby when we first got there, but only for about a minute, and not very well. It seemed like he couldn’t wait to hand him back. Anyway, the case worker started discussing the steps that mom would need to take to get her child back and dad kind of whispered something to the psychiatrist. No one really heard him so he said it louder. He said, “I don’t want any homosexual raising my child.” No one really answered him. Then he said it again and the psychiatrist explained to him that we were the foster parents and that we were a married heterosexual couple. Dad then pointed to my husband and stated, “No, that guy is gay.” We just sat there with are mouths shut and let the psychiatrist deal with it. The case worker got through all of the expectations of the bio mom and the started stating what dad would need to do. Dad adamantly stated that he wasn’t going to take substance abuse classes, parenting classes, or see any judges. He also didn’t know his address and doesn’t believe in phones. If you want to contact him you either need to write him a letter or leave a note on his door at home. Two other questions dad asked was if we were feeding the baby and also if we get a check for him. I told of course we are feeding him and that even if we did receive a check it would never cover daycare, formula, and diapers. Dad also stated that he had no family that he would want the baby go to.I felt better after the meeting and a little insane………..I just keep saying that no one would believe if I told them what is like to visit your child’s mother and father in a mental hospital.

All of the visits after that one, dad has been a no show. Mom asks every time I walk in where he is and I have to tell her over and over again that I don't know him. She tells the same stories week after week, but is always pleasant. She is always respectful. At the last visit she really wanted me to know that she DID NOT want her brother and sister in law to get the baby. I assured her that the document she signed at court would make sure that they wouldn't.
I also asked her if she would like to change the babies diaper; she tried but admitted she didn't know what to do. I helped with the diaper change and also snapping his pants back together.
She really only holds him for about 10 minutes during the hour visit. She gets nervous, bored or is just so wrapped up in her own story that she can't focus on him.

This week I was suppose to go visit mom on Tuesday, but the mental hospital social worker called and said it wouldn’t be appropriate. Mom was having a bad day. I asked if I should come later that week and she said it probably wouldn't be a good idea..... I made sure I called little bit's case worker so she could document this cancelled visit.

As for an update on little bit, he is getting really chubby and is smiling all of the time. He usually sleeps through the night and loves car rides. He is just a huge blessing to our family. William loves him so much and calls him his baby. He is a wonderful big brother. I have his 2 months check-up tomorrow-shots and all-I will update then, I promise!!!

Oh, and if you would like to see a picture of little bit, shoot me an e-mail!!