Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Thanks you guys!!

Wow! You guys are such a great support system!!! I always knew this, but I really felt it after my post last week. I am preparing myself for tomorrow's visit. At least my husband is coming with me; he just can't pass up going to a mental hospital on Halloween. I will write again tomorrow to keep you updated.....

Congrats to both cookie crumbs and dream mommny on their good news!!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

1st visit

I had my first experience with baby mama drama on Wednesday when we met for the first time. Not from her, since she is bi-polar and schizophrenic, and is not in this world most of the time; but from the Volunteers of America who wanted to place the baby and her in a home even though she is clearly not capable of taking care of either of them. Not to mention she is still in a mental hospital and the doctor is the one who said that she is not capable, and that is why the baby was placed with us in the first place.

Anyway, we have a lawyer now and our case worker has assured us that VOA is contracted by the hospital and has no say over the baby. So even if she is placed by them, the baby will not go. The mother still needs to work her case plan just like everyone else who wants to get their children back. They have found “dad” and he supposedly wants to be involved, but is currently in a halfway house of sorts and has no family support. I think that VOA has a lot to do with him being “involved.” .

Needless to say I was a basket case. I couldn’t believe my ears. These people really think it would be in this child’s best interest to live in a residential home for his entire life with a woman who couldn’t remember who I was after ten minutes of visiting?!? They were trying to assure the case worker that there is 24 hour supervision at the home. Well, if you need 24 hour supervision to raise your baby, maybe you shouldn’t have your baby….

I cried most of the morning, and not for the fear of losing my sweet pea, but for the life he would be subjected to if he had to live with his mother. I really think that if I handed the baby over to my son, who is four, and said take care of him, he could do a better job. Not to mention he would get better with time since he would grow up and is able to learn new skills. Sweet pea’s mother will never be capable of living by herself. I just kept thinking my boy would probably end up in the same mental hospital or a juvenile home or jail or worse….

Okay, I am getting way ahead of myself and have promised to take this one day at a time. As the case worker said if mom wants him back she needs to work the plan and she hasn’t done anything yet. Also, they wanted to start visits while she was in the mental hospital to show to the courts that she is not capable. My husband is coming to the next visit so at least I won't feel so blind sided.

Keep us in your prayers....

Saturday, October 20, 2007

My boy...

Is an angel sent from heaven. He only wakes up once a night to eat and goes back to sleep. He is content being held or sleeping in his crib. He loves to eat and is a great little brother!

Now, the waiting begins once again. It seems likely that he will stay with us since they were looking for an adoptive placement, not just a foster home. Also, we have already been approved to take him home for Thanksgiving and Christmas; and no visitation has been set up for his mother as of yet.

I am trying to stay positive and hopeful, but infertility has jaded me into thinking that the worst case scenario is going to happen. I have to be honest and say that I cry from happiness and grieving everyday. I know how blessed I am to have this child in my life, but I also know it may not be forever. However, I will enjoy everyday I get to spend with this incredible boy and love him, love him, love him!!!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

He's here!!!

We got our boy yesterday! We waited for three hours with no word from the case worker, but she showed up with him at 6:30. We were hoping to get him before cross-country practice; the entire team was on our front yard as they pulled up. The worker, said she has never seen such a homecoming. He is healthy, about 6 1/2 lbs, dark hair. He has hardly made a sound since he arrived...he is very content, except for his appetite. He took down four ounces of formula like it was nothing. William is very excited! He has been waiting for a sibling for a long time.

Friday, October 12, 2007

It's a boy!

So we are "technically" (all the paper work is in) not certified yet, but my son will be dropped off on Monday at 3:30.

What we know so far:

His mother is in a facility (jail)
His biological father is nowhere to be found (mom's not sure who he is)
He had no drugs in his system
He is 2 days old today

I’m still in shock, but so excited!!!

Sunday, October 07, 2007

IUI #2

Estrogen level 826
Sperm count 65million
Doctor's exact words, "I am cautiously optimistic!"

Thursday, October 04, 2007


Okay things that are done:

References: had two different people get them, finish them, and fax them back in one day....That's impressive!

Sizes of our bedrooms- DONE!

Things that are almost done:

I need to call the doctors office tomorrow since they have the form they just need the fax number to send it back.

I can’t find my pay stub since I only have gotten one since the beginning of the school year and won't get another one till next Friday (once a month pay periods.) Need to get a copy from our HR office.

Just need to find time to search in our cars and get the insurance cards copied.

We also need to have our backgrounds checked in Colorado and we have to have a form notarized and send $10.00 each!!!

Will the paper trail never end!

The funny thing is now I get a phone call from my worker once or twice a day to see my progress on this list....what is the deal with these people? They don't call for weeks and then they nag.

In other news my 2nd IUI is scheduled for this Saturday. I went in today and got my HCG shot. At least IUI’s aren’t so invasive.